Growth Of Consciousness


My life is so weird these days and so full of energy and knowledge that there is little room for anything else. I'm experiencing a different reality to that of my first 40 years of life, and things seem to be predominantly polarised into good and evil in my everyday experience and I can only imagine that this is the Kundalini energy in me driving this.

My thoughts are so much more expansive than ever before and I find that I quickly assess my experiences of the day into patterns such that I look for intent and meaning behind everything. I know that nothing is as it seems on the surface and my days of confidence in what people say to me being for the best, and ignorance at the objective of the message they are trying to communicate, are long behind me. I am so aware of the extraneous detail, nuances, and imagery references that people use in their speach now, and as much of an effort it is to process all this information, it is equally worthwhile as it is so interesting to try and understand peoples motivations and behaviours.

Of course behind all of this is the polarisation I speak of, and the patterns that I perceive boil down to their basic stimulus of good versus evil, like reducing fractions to their smallest form. It is like I am seeing conciousness of those around me, and the subject-object nature of my consciousness itself has fractured into a constantly fluctuating sea of possibilities that may or may not resolve into reality. I am still me and I still perceive the world as before, however there is a new layer to my perception, like an ability to suddenly see infrared as well as the rest of the colour spectrum.

There's also an embryonic feeling in me that somehow I can pick things from this sea of possibilities and bring them into resolution. I've had some experiences that match a quote I remember from somewhere and by someone unknown "if one speaks only the truth, then the truth will obey you" and feel that this is somehow my future path for growth.


This feels like some kind of training?