Today I find myself craving the state of bliss which I felt before and longing for the unity with the world which I experienced a month ago. I feel like I am prepared to throw the towel in and give up on work, my home, my family, and to seek once again that feeling of total bliss.

It has changed me forever and I am now not the same person that I was a year ago. In my new body I perceive things very differently and I have become bored of the life I previously lead, sense pleasures are all nothing now to me, and i do not gain any benefit from indulging in them and instead my heart pines for the overwhelming feelings of the kundalini surge and its euphoric state of mind. It's like it is the only thing in my life that has ever mattered, or will ever matter again. If I could leave work and go to a place where I could sit quietly under a tree and meditate in the warming sun I would do it without hesitation, so strong is this pull to the divine in me. Everything in my life that lead me to "that point", has become background noise for me, and while it was all necessary for me to reach, I hesitate to say moksha, I have transcended it and would now drop it all in favour of achieving the state once again.

It is of course not possible for me to do without destroying my life as it is today, and thus it is a selfish endeavour, that does not seem to tally with a selfless mind set. I hope I can reach the state once again, in my normal life routine, as I did before. Plus I will always have the memory of the experience burned into my mind, and when I feel low or preoccupied in the work/home environment I can reflect, remember, and recall the time when I was at one with the universe.



Has anyone given everything up for Kundalini?