I am finding that distractions are meaning less to me and the fewer good feelings they bring, the more of them I want.

This is an addiction and my craving for CD's, DVD's, gadgets, and for praise even, is leading me down a path that can only end in trouble. Fortunately alcohol has made me so sick that I don't want to get mindlessly drunk anymore, but I still have an insatiable urge for things that i believe will bring me happiness and I will snatch at anything that might offer some happiness, even though I am painfully aware that they won't.

I'm on the verge all the time at the moment, its got to stop and i'm the only one who can stop it. Time is adversary of mine right now also, I need to make friends with it again.