Second Waking Dream

I have been ill for two days, I had a fever, my stomach has been very painfull and my head has not quite ached, but has been noticeably different. I have needed to sleep an awful lot, what do I attribute this to?

Well on Friday night I had a long waking dream, like I mean a whole days worth of conscious activity while I was asleep for a few hours. At the time of the dream I was excited and this time my excitement did not wake me. I played with the experience like I was playing a computer game, trying things out and experimenting with my environment.

I went through a day as if it were real, but without the constraints of a normal day; I could affect my environment, I could come and go as I pleased, and I didn't have to do any work. It was an experience that marks my belief in the words of Don Juan regarding Dreaming that have until now just been words and not anything real.

So it seems that I am growing, and with my growth comes some growing pains, I have read about how Castaneda was ill for days after experiences he had, so this was not a surprise to me and in fact reinforced the experience as real.

It still seems weird to me that after wanting this for as long as I can remember that I am not more overwhelmed by it. The morning after my controlled dream I was very unimpressed, as if some sort of defence mechanism kicked in and suppressed me from leaping up and shouting Woo hoo!

The whole experience seemed dull and unimportant. Perhpas this is the reason why it happened now, my sobriety is at a level where I can handle this kind of shift of my assemblage point.

Deep to the left hand side is it ;0)


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